Caregivers and Death

I was reading a discussion on Caregiver.com about people with AD & likes dying and the time it takes and how to handle it.  First I want to say that those who say celebrate the persons life are correct. To that I add do not morn for that is self serving and arrogant. Because I feel that it is only a self pitty thing, why am I alone now, they had no right, etc.

I said my good byes long ago to my family when we knew what was going on and freely talk about my passing. Quiet frankly I cannot wait. You see on this side of the fence we cannot escape any of the ravages in anyway but death, you can get relief and put us in homes how nice for you. I have in hte past expressed my feelings on these things, we are still kept silent and still put away. Well while I am alive and can I hope I promote some real thought over this home putting crap. I kind of understand, you are 78 and the only one to cae for your loved one, home may be or is the right place. My bitch is with the offspring, how would have it been when you got sick mom and dad just sent you away or sent you to other family members and they passed you on, because it casused extra time of your day to care. Think about it. I know my wife and I have been there every step of the way for our kids, sickness, catatrosphic illnesses, major accidents, arrests, drug and alcohol problesm we have seen them all but have been there, no matter how old they have gotten or how much we did not want to be involved, but they are our family and we do what families do, take care of each other.
I guess no one really hanlesd death well that remains behind, but just think of us that go ahead  of you we are set free, no more of the confusion, frustration, pain, forgettfulness, not know who or what anything or anyone is, no more diapers, rubber sheets, being hand fed or laying in bed all the time. I am wiery of the fight and now just let it work its job so that I can win in the end by passing. I reallly hate this feeling great and in control one moment and the nothing makes sense and seems to be real or knowing where the fuck I am or what I am doing.

I need to stop. Take care of yourselves.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!!
joe

PS> to those that voted I applaud you, to those that did not and could have keep you mouths shut you gave up the right to say anything. Maybe next time you will get your head out of your ass and use your right to vote.

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Trying Hard

Well Joe is trying hard to keep up with things but they are getting away from him. He is working with the people with the book and it is taking a toll. He gets frustrated with things and I don't blame him. You give explicit instructions and they don't follow them. Well he will keep trying. We can be in the middle of a conversation and he drops off to sleep or he talks to someone else in his head. He is taking alot more naps lately. He is going to try and do the memory walk with us on Nov. 6. It is one mile from the pier by the beach and one mile back. I told him we would pick him up on the way back if he can't make it. The grandkids might walk it with us and my mother will be there too. So things are moving along here.
Lynn

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I Can Take Directions???????

I was told do not shoot the refrigerator.  Last hunting trip it was still alive and well. I just look straight in and not at the botoom creatures. They call but I do not listen I just hear them, kind of like your kids do.

Went and saw my shrink today and we changed meds again, or actually I did.  Told him the last stuff he gave me I think it was lats month was at the hazardous waste dump. It ripped my system apart. Back on the old stuff, feeling fine, except have to get the old poop train back on track and the fund dissolver as well.

having fun refinishing a cedar chest, of course my friened Bobby had to sand the thing, otherwise it would have had mountain ranges and gorges in it. He did a beautiful job on the sanding. Yess my staining and varnishing shills are excellent except the stuff makes me loopy, just what I need.

To all of you who visit here and leave your comments, I deeply appreciate them. You who claim to have nothing to say, I say bull, HELLO works well. Nothing important to add, the fact that you stop by, say hello or whatever is important to me and the rest of this world family we have created.So do not be shy.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!!!
joe

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Alone

For those of you that read the comments and those that are taking care of anybody with this damn disease you understand what Deb is talking about. Our lives take on a new direction. Not only are those with the disease withdrawn but so are the family members and the caregivers. We are withdrawn from society because we can't get them to go out or hold a conversation anymore. So yes we sit and watch tv shows and do things that we do not really want to do because it is what they want to do and it is hard. Try to keep doing normal things for you. If only it is to get out to the grocery store, or have lunch with a friend. We have lost our best freinds. And we will lose them again. Conversations are hard because they either do not want to talk or they can't get the right words out. We play charades alot. Joe will want to say something and usually starts ok but he ends up pointing or grimacing and I can usually figure out what it is he wants. As with everything else it too will go down the drain. Joe started this to let everybody that wanted to, realize what was happening inside a victims head, understand what they were going through. I am glad that he has helped.

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