Early Onset Alzheimers

Yesterday my physcollogsit and I discussed this topic. Generally from time of this diagnosis till time to leave is about 8 years. Check the people that have died from the HBO special and the timeline and that of Sarge Schriver diag. in 2003 just died 2011. The list goes on.

We got to talking about the time period and EOA. My opinion only is that what is called EOA is not, it is more towards the middle stages. My reasoning, which is questoinable, is most of us are told when we start to notice things going wrong, oh it is STRESS, you are just DEPRESSED, you are DISTRACTED and you know the other bullshit. It generally is years before anyone really starts to listen and connnect the dots and finally does reall testing and oh well now you have EOA. I say no, you had EOA possibly for as much as 10 years befoer those white coats figured it out. Of course you had no idea, even though you kept on saying no that is not the problem this is. But of course you did not read page 89 of the med journal of AD and the box you have to fit in to have it.

Yes we both disagreed with each other at the beginning, but since his dad died from AD, he thought back and started to understand what I was trying to say, just maybe the real deal. He is a good man, shit he has put up with me for almost 6 years, so who is the sicker one! He asked me when I first noticed things going goofin and best I could remember I was around fifty, i could not multitask without notes anymore or even handle the number of tasks that I could and it got worse and worse. Of course i had SDD syndrome, right.

What I am trying to say while I am still somwhat together is, if you feel there are reall problems going on in your head, do not allow your doctor to just push it off as the SDD syndrome. You have to fight for you period.

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For Those Who Can Still Walk!!!!!

Yes this disease even takes that away from you. I know I have griped abouut the brain going away, but it seems my feet and legs are developing a mind of their own now. Several times I have falleen and trip and got hurt, but never thought of how AD is affecting me in that way.  Well the other day I had some sense knoccked into me. I was putting away the garbage cans, tuff duty right? We let me tell you it can be, putting the last can away I was practicing walking backwards, front ways not that good, try something new: Well I check where I was going turneed back around, steppped out of my sliper, apparently steped on my foot, you got it I went on a trip. My rather robust bottom slammed on the walk way, my back hit the pavers and this empty head of mine proceeded to put a rather nice looking dent in the one metal storage shed we have.  I have to admit the shed looks good it now has character. Me I have character to, back hurts like hell, my head hurts, the crack in my bottom has widened and I have been advised by my keepers, that maybe I should not do that anymore. You loose one freedom after another with this crap.

Until we meet again, take care of yourselves. I hold walking classes every Tuesday at 1pm PST.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!
joe (the marathon walker)

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Hello to all as we near the end of this year. I am still in February I have no idea where the rest of this time has gone or what has happended. As some of you know I attend a 12 step group and have for centuries to fight my disease of alcohol and am still sober some 37 years. I was at a ongoing meeting on Christmas Eve, we have what they call marathon meetings around certain holidays to add extra support, what made this special to me and has caused me to wonder if we have the stages of AD right, yes we have it starts and you die correct, but the inbetween seeems to be not so straight forward. I know I have written on my blog the stages, others have, Alz Org has, but you folks, my experience and what happended Christmas Eve tell me in my mind at least that there is no set inbetween stages actually, that we experience similiar things to a greater or lesser degree as suffers. I man shared at the meeting that his father had passed in the last week from AD and he was happy for him and said how he felt. I fortunately had the oppportunity to talk with the gentleman after the meeting, hugged him and told him I was glad his dad had been set free. We looked at each other and I know he was confused, hell I know that feeling, so I gave him my card that has my book info on it. We talked about how his dad was diagnosed about 3 years ago with it, for most of the time he was level had some problems then came the LINE CROSSING, 4 months ago when we knew no one and went downhill and died in the 4 month period from AD. He and I feel the same if we can prevent ourselves (he does not have it yet) from getting to that line to end it before. He saw the suffering of his father and the destruction on the family and does not want to go through that or put the family through it. Unfortunately his mother is at some point in the disease, where?????? Another lady joined us and told about her parents dying from AD a number of years ago and as I listened I could hear that her parents did not follow the so called stages either. Yes they had portions of them but kind of out of order. I see that in myself and think what master mind is comming up with this stuff. Maybe we need to revist how the disease really progresses, the middle part, we know that it starts and then we die. I know for me this is long, but I was very much touched and moved by these folks, I could see their suffering, but they were able to understand to a point my side. Especially when we talked of how they could get away from it and here I was at this meeting still getting support to help me not drink and I brought along old Mr. AD, i cannot get away from it not even a second.

Well I need to shut up, take care of yourselves and if I forget, Have A Very Happy New Year one and all.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!
joe

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Hello to all this day. My wife who has been my main caregiver and has been home with me for almost the last year is now working again.  She is working as a CAREGIVER, thats right and her first client, well this is jus a kick is an elderly man with, yes you got it AD. The woman is a glutten for punishment.

She has been away now several days home in the evening and I plain do not like it. She is my rock with this, but I guess she is needed other places as well. I feel very uncomfortable over it. I could bitch, but I am going to try and restrain my dislike of the matter. Still have my mother in law here with me, but not the same. I feel lost without Lynn. But she is needed elsewhere at this time.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!!!
joe

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Just A Note

This is to let you know that my book is now available online at Amazon.com and BarnesandNobles. Kindle and Nookbook electronic downloads are available as well.

This Saturday past, we had a Memory Walk here in Oceanside and it went well. Old fleet of foot here sat on his fat you know what, bad feet. Did get to me a wonderful lady, Cheryl, who lives in the area and follows my blog, nice to put a face on a name.

Bye for now.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!
joe

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Caregivers and Death

I was reading a discussion on Caregiver.com about people with AD & likes dying and the time it takes and how to handle it.  First I want to say that those who say celebrate the persons life are correct. To that I add do not morn for that is self serving and arrogant. Because I feel that it is only a self pitty thing, why am I alone now, they had no right, etc.

I said my good byes long ago to my family when we knew what was going on and freely talk about my passing. Quiet frankly I cannot wait. You see on this side of the fence we cannot escape any of the ravages in anyway but death, you can get relief and put us in homes how nice for you. I have in hte past expressed my feelings on these things, we are still kept silent and still put away. Well while I am alive and can I hope I promote some real thought over this home putting crap. I kind of understand, you are 78 and the only one to cae for your loved one, home may be or is the right place. My bitch is with the offspring, how would have it been when you got sick mom and dad just sent you away or sent you to other family members and they passed you on, because it casused extra time of your day to care. Think about it. I know my wife and I have been there every step of the way for our kids, sickness, catatrosphic illnesses, major accidents, arrests, drug and alcohol problesm we have seen them all but have been there, no matter how old they have gotten or how much we did not want to be involved, but they are our family and we do what families do, take care of each other.
I guess no one really hanlesd death well that remains behind, but just think of us that go ahead  of you we are set free, no more of the confusion, frustration, pain, forgettfulness, not know who or what anything or anyone is, no more diapers, rubber sheets, being hand fed or laying in bed all the time. I am wiery of the fight and now just let it work its job so that I can win in the end by passing. I reallly hate this feeling great and in control one moment and the nothing makes sense and seems to be real or knowing where the fuck I am or what I am doing.

I need to stop. Take care of yourselves.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!!
joe

PS> to those that voted I applaud you, to those that did not and could have keep you mouths shut you gave up the right to say anything. Maybe next time you will get your head out of your ass and use your right to vote.

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An Email From a Friend.......

As many of you know from time to time I share emails with permission. This is one I got just recently. You all seem to be amazed that even advancing in this fricken disease I can still communicate. I want you to know that all of us with AD or other forms of dementia are not always stumbling, bumbling and drooling people. Some to the end, not many still reamin mentally strong, maybe not physically but one cannot have everything. Also this email may give you a hint of why I take no meds for AD, just mood stabilizers, the shit does not work if that helps.**************

Dear Joe and Lynn,
 
Thank you again for your response...these letters and blogs must keep you both very busy...I don't know how Joe still does it, but thank you from the bottom of my heart.  My father suffered from AD silently...we did not know what he was thinking or feeling...he tried to live life as if he didn't have the disease, including not talking about it.  The only glimpses we had were his physical struggles, his hallucinations, and listening to his frustrations...we had to try to fill in ourselves what was going on in his head.  Joe, you have no idea how much your shared words help us understand what you are feeling or experiencing or thinking...more than you know.  I wish my father could have expressed what he was experiencing, but he didn't, so I am learning from you.
 
I just checked into your blog...I am sorry to say that I haven't been able to keep up with it regularly (due to restricted internet access), but every time I visit your page, it brings tears to my eyes...I am just filled up with sentimental emotion on how much you share, and your struggles doing it, and your struggles with the disease...thank you for all the work you put in.  I am amazed at how articulate you still are at this stage.
 
I am so happy you published a book!!!! That's great.
 
I unfortunately could not find the memorial link on your page...I must be overlooking it.  But I would love to send you the information on my father, and a photo.  I will let my mother know.
 
I was also thrilled to hear that you are doing the Memory walk in Oceanside.  Before I knew that, I was going to e-mail and ask if you and/or your family if you and they might be interested because I want to do it too.  But I have to get my butt in gear to sign up and send out the e-mails.  My mother did the walk in Florida about a week or two ago.  I'll honor my father with a team bearing his name; however, I do not have family here, so unless friends join me (and they might), I might be a team of one.  I would be honored to walk with you and Lynn if you like.  It sounds like you might not have many walking with you, so if you and Lynn need any help at all, I would be happy and honored to help.  I helped give care to my father until he passed.
 
This is getting long for you to read, so I will sign off.  If you want to put any of this last response on your blog, you have my permission.
 
God bless you all (and my father would have agreed with Joe on "...and this great country of ours")
 
Cheryl

________________________________

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!

joe

PS Cheryl has no real idea what emails and comments from you folks really mean to me. They keep me wanting to post, even though I feel no one really gives a shit.

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I Can Take Directions???????

I was told do not shoot the refrigerator.  Last hunting trip it was still alive and well. I just look straight in and not at the botoom creatures. They call but I do not listen I just hear them, kind of like your kids do.

Went and saw my shrink today and we changed meds again, or actually I did.  Told him the last stuff he gave me I think it was lats month was at the hazardous waste dump. It ripped my system apart. Back on the old stuff, feeling fine, except have to get the old poop train back on track and the fund dissolver as well.

having fun refinishing a cedar chest, of course my friened Bobby had to sand the thing, otherwise it would have had mountain ranges and gorges in it. He did a beautiful job on the sanding. Yess my staining and varnishing shills are excellent except the stuff makes me loopy, just what I need.

To all of you who visit here and leave your comments, I deeply appreciate them. You who claim to have nothing to say, I say bull, HELLO works well. Nothing important to add, the fact that you stop by, say hello or whatever is important to me and the rest of this world family we have created.So do not be shy.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!!!
joe

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What is in YOUR Refrigerator?

A few years ago we had the kitcehn remodeled. New Honey Oak Cabinets, with black nobs with dark cherry wood centers, the walls in a chocolate color, and a Brazilian Cherry Hardwood Floor, Black Stove & Microwave and a Black & Stainless Steel Dishwasher.  Then there sat6 are very old but working fine White Refrigerator. So for years you know who has been bitching for one to match, yes me. Well we just purchased a new one. Reasons, much more energy efficient then are 15 year old one, quieter, it has crushed ice a must for me, but most importantly it is BLACK and matches the decor. Happy am I, yes, except for opening it.

You see the last one the bottom drawers were solid and you could not see what was in them. This one they are CLEAR and you see everything. So what you say, well let me tell you there are creatures in those bins. I open the door and they stare at me, I know they want me. I cannot look at them, sill y yess, but that is how my brain reacts to them.Lynn just says Joe, get over yourself and deal with it. Not so simple, things like this are creeping into my life now and I can only wonder what lies ahead. The part of my brain that still understands logic laughs at me, but there is that growing part that sees and witnesses strange things and seems to have more control. The stuff in thre drawers seems to have eyes and moves when I look at it, not anyone else, just me and that is what really counts is how I feel about it.Well I guess I will just have to outfit myself for hunting when I go to the refrig that way I am prepaired for any attack.

Thank you all for being here for me.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!
joe


PS: PLEASE NOTE IN MEMORY OF PHOTOS NOW HAVE THEIR OWN PAGE!!!!!!!!

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Brains or Trains

I wonder sometimes if I have any brains left or if they are just trains runnnning in a circle. Things to me seem to be getting fuzzier each day. I forget mor of what I am going to do each day. Wife is up North visiting daughter and kids, I just could not take going after her 50th a week or so ago.  I found 32 good reasonss to commit homicide that day, way too much noise, movement, people, just a real grate on my brain, nerves and patience.

I am glad to see the going back and forth in comments and Lynn's posting.  We got one the other day that we discussed and both of us for diffferent reasons.  She could understand the people resenting the fact that the parents who are becoming a problem and like me, living another 5 or more years. Lynn feels that way about me at times and we both think it is normal and good to express it. You need time away from us guys to help yourselves. See I look at it that I may have to put up with those arround me hovering, checking, watching ever annoying me even for another year.  I wish they would just disappear at times. I think both sides feel this way, have to, we with Dementia are really a handfull, I think worse than trying to raise baby tripplets. See have the time I do not know what I want or what I am doing, just like a kid.

I want to say welcome to all of you that visit my blog. From Russia, US, Canada, Latvia, China, Brazil, Austrailia, etc., it boggles my brain cell.  Thank you all for visiting. I hope to be adding new resources to the list on the side soon for you all.

God Bless & Keep You and This Country of Ours (and the World)!!!!!
joe

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Asking for Help & New Link Added.

I have added a new link, Nursing Home Abuse, for those of you that may have problems with a nursing home or need help in finding and how to look for one.  Do hope that this will be of help.

I am glad to see the comments of help going back and forth, this will help you I think and hope. This is what this blog has been waiting for.  Out of the avg of 179 people that visit each day, I think some of you have great wisdom to offer each other. For me, getting better is not taking place, getting worse is and will till it kills me.

You all know I just love the medical profession and researchers with great and profound moranity. I got a mailer the other day, Alhzeimers cured and the cause, medical book supposedly. AD caused by lack of insulin in other words diabetes of the brain. The gist is that extra insulin can halt or even reverse the damage. A lot of quacks out there, amazing that this one dr. has found this out and has not shared it with the medical community but is with the world.  I think I will go have to cokes so the caffine stops my AD.

I need some help or at least to know if any one with AD out there or caregivers have noticed this happening:
For a cpl of months now I have been experienncing pain in the brain, this is not a headache or migrane as one knows them to be.  It is like someone with really big hands is reachin inside my skull and just squeezing the hell out of my one brain cell, trying to make it smaller. This can last for hours to days, even longer once it is gone I notice that more of me is gone.  I guess the details I follow because of my employment was in the field of computers and data gathering and details, still with me to a degree. Have talke to my shrink and pyhsycologist about this and get a dumb look. So you folks my family if you have any info on this I sure would like to know about it, I feel alone enough now without being the only one with this bull shit.

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The very Fabric of This Blog

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "talking it out":

Hi there Lynn & Joe. You two sound like such a perfect couple. I'm sorry to say that I am not feeling that way about my husband and I. My spouse is 17 years older than me. He was diagnosed about the same time as Joe and yes, he seems to be experiencing relatively the same stages that Joe is going through. But I must confess, I am not feeling like the pleasant, let me make you feel better caregiver right now. The TV can only be on one of the two channels he chooses, Fox News or the Weather Channel and he doesn't even watch them. He, like you Joe, stares off into space. I try to strike up any type of conversation by commenting about what they have just shown on TV but he wasn't watching it and has no idea what they were talking about. Then he gets angry with me because he is confused about my comments. Lately, he is always crankey and YELLING at me and our extended family (5 children, 6 grandchildren) so they don't seem to come around anymore. I do go to work part time but he is insistant that I not leave him for more than a few hours at a time and demands that I not go anywhere away from him for any type of enjoyment. He doesn't even want me to go shopping to get things that we need, only to the grocery store a half mile away. He makes me feel guilty that he is afraid he will die alone and that I must be with him at all times. And I don't mean just at our home, he insists I be in the same room with him ALL the time. People say to me that I should get out and do things for myself. I agree. But the reality of life is that other people don't include you when they know you have to be home with your spouse all the time. They don't want to be the cause of his anger either. So here I sit feeling so all alone in the same room as him. I provide his meals, cut his hair, do the grocery shopping, take care of our expenses and accounts, pick up his prescriptions, do his laundry and clean up after him. He refuses to go ANYWHERE. Will not leave the house and wants me to do the same. I do understand that what he is going through is very difficult. But there is never any expression of gratitude or even acknowledgement that this is difficult for me to go through also. He used to tell me every night when we went to bed that he loved me, but even that has gone. Now I only seem to be the object of his anger and frustration. But all the same, I will keep on keeping on. I won't give up, but it does help to have an outlet to release my feelings, even if it is to someone I have never met and never will.

Joe, please give Lynn a hug and let her know how much you love and appreciate her. Sounds like you have a real piece of gold to hang on to through this journey we all pass through. My love to you both.

The above is a comment shared on this blog in respose to a posting by my wife Lynn, who I am 16 years older than. This lady is suffering just as Lynn is, I have become very combative, pig headed, a dick, paranoid and more withdrawn.  I have asked many of you to be guest bloggers for the above very reason. I cannot tell you how many 100's of emails I have received just like the above comment.  See all I can respond to these people is that I am sorry for your mate and you, but it is only going to get worse, a lot of comfort right, wrong, but it is the truth. I ask again that you help with posting. See even if you do the same thing everyday, you still do something a little different and that little difference could help someone like this lady. Me i love and appreciate your words of encouragement, but really they are gone as soon as I read them. You see I know that I will not get better only worse and it is doing that quite well. I am on a journey to keep an appointment with mental collapse and physical death that is the reality of it. It sucks, i hate how i feel, i do not like my distrust and disgust with others, but my emotions are no longer mine, I even do not feel bad anymore when I am a real pain in the ass or hurt feelings, my brain says tough crap to you. I hear and see things now that are not there, i do not even know when I am being talked to. Sex keeps rolling in my brain but the old pecker does not help out and I even say who the hell caaares to taht. I am getting like my good friend Dr. Joe Savick, making a 42 paragraph post. Thanks for listening shit has hjust built up in me and while I am thinking of it I am making this post.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours.
Joe

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And You Say I am NOT NAGGED!!!

attacked from all angles


First let me wish you all a belated 4th of July!!
You know it is difficult when everyone is watching what you are doing constantly. OH of course the wife does not watch over me or nag, not the kids either, THEY have trained the fricken bird and cat to do their dirty work. I am surprised they have not given the fish feet and artificial living tanks so that they can come and spy as well. It has gotten so that I have no privacy under constant surveliance like a member of the KGB, well they won't catch me, my brain cell is working out a plan. As soon as it lets me know what the hell it is then I can do something about this invasion.

Seriously they need to watch me, I do some of the dumbest things, besides not letting the wall get out of my way before I walk into it. There are times I really do not know what the hell I am doiing or what I am talking about.  This is geetting more difficult as time goes on and it is suppose to, but it sure plays hell with what i want to do, which I do not know what that is to start with. Yes there has been joy this year two new grandchildren, my new koi pond, which I rarely sit by anymore, actually two ponds. all have mosiquto fish in them, cute little devils they are and do they populate.

Well I guess I have bitched enough, well maybe not, but at least I remembered most of what I wanted to say in this post, which in and of itself is something.  My physcologist would say that I am still in there somewhere, but the question is where.  He has been seeing me and been my friend for a number of years now, his father died from this damned disease, so he knows from where my anger and confusion and thoughts come from.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!
joe

PS: I can go anywhere I want, that is what I am told, but here is the kicker I have to be taken there, real freedom, right!

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Today I am not clear ast to what i want to say. It is becoming difficult for me to keeep my thoughts in order, as if they ever were. I am becoming more distant from my family, I feel very trapped by everything. We went to the Birch Aquarium, I think it is called, in San Diego on Friday, it was fun, but to tell the truth I was not really part of being there, although the lady at the sharks was interesting, but you know my wife, she would not let me bring her home. I am having more diffficulties with talking to, seems to come out sideways, good thing those around me have a clue to what I am saying, because I don't. I have been watching and noticing all the things now that they say will slow down your getting AD and all the things that cause it. It just leads me to believe even more so that these people are morons and have no idea what they are doing. In most cases giving people false hope and bullshit answers. Kind of sounds like are President and Congress. What the hell most of them went to the same schools anyhow. Well I am rambling, getting good at this. Also have changed the site again and probably will still more, gives me something to do and screw up at the same time. Well bye for now.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!!
joe

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Expectations

I have been doing this blog for a number of years now. Trying to tel you what it is like on this sid of the fence. I am begining to wonder if what I am saying is getting old and has no meaning. See I belong to a group study and we have a saying, "EXPECTATIONS ARE PREMEDITATED RESENTMENTS"! I feel those resentments because I seem to get far less comments or emails. That is my proble because I am expecting something in return for my posts, really I am not entitled to any replies. This is my story with the disease and only my point of vew, such as it maybe.

I met with my shrink today and we kind of got into it and I told him you do not know what is in this world in which I live now, you are on the other side, you are one of them. I know that my progresion has been seemingly slow and I have been well contained for lack of another word. But that is only because of the brain power that I possed when this all started, I could control a lot of what was happending and hide it, I am no longer able to do that, it (AD & FTD) are doing their jobs very well now and the fox can no longer out run or manuver them. Thank goodness my friends and family are around to guide me or I would be totally lost. I do not even want to leave my house anylonger or really take part in life, I am retreating into myself where I feel safe. Whether this is part of the proscess or not I do not know, all I know is that it is happening.

Take care of yourselves.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!
joe

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Pay Attention

Joe posted a few weeks ago about the fact that we have had some difficulity. He has had some issues and yes I was hurt by them. But in all fairness I guess I am to blame too. As you know he can still find his way around the computer and sometimes it gets him and others into trouble. So as a caregiver and as a spouse I am going to say that we need to ask questions when our other half is doing something that we are not sure of. We need to check the bank statements and credit card statements just to make sure there are no charges there that we do not know about. $10 here and there really add up. Also just like we do with our children we need to know who they are talking to. Whether on the phone or on the computer. So I am sure that we will have a few more arguments about how we nag and are trying to control things but, if we don't damage can be done that can not be forgiven or forgotten. Fortunately we are working on our end. So do not be surprised when he writes that I am being a nag and not liking me or others very much. We do it out of love.

Pay Attention to what is going on around the person you care for.

Lynn

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When Happiness Leaves & Shadows Come

As I walk on this journey of mine, although not alone, it does not seem that way anymore.

The wife and I have tried to have discussion about what is going on with me, but that veil of secrecy that has always been around me seem to be even thicker now. It is becoming more difficult for me to express what is happening and what is inside, because frankly I am not sure what the hell is taking place. I get more lost in my own head then I do elsewhere. Out and about with people is close to being a no no.

Lynn has asked me several times what would make me happy. Each time she has asked I come up with only one answer and that is to die or cross over the line. I no longer like this on the edge shit, it is to confusing, frustrating and just gets in the way of everything. I spend to much time crying inside and I have come to dislike me a great deal. But there really is nothing I can do about that, the disease is doing its job and the meds, even increasing them is not helping. Knew this time would come, just did not want to be here for it. But since I am not the ruler of the universe, be thankful, it is not in my time but his (I wish he would hurry).

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!!
joe

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Is There Sex After Dementia?

Yes if you are a rabbit.  See all other tests are done on lab mice, so if they do not have it you cannot, because according to all the people with Paper Hanging Degrees (PHDs), mice and us are very much alike. I have often wondered why I had four feet, a long tail and grey fur, how stupid of me.

OK this is a serious question. I cannot speak for anyone but myself. For quite awhile the answer was NO. It did not work and my brain did not stay with it and still does not. I am allergic to the pills, I am not having rods stuck in my pride and joy, nor having a pump put in it or on it.  But guess what there are shots. They use, let me get this right, vascular dilators, and have nothing to do with your sex drive or lack of it. This is man side only, sorry ladies. You administer the shot in the right or left side of uncle willie only. Not on the top, bottom, tip, or like stupid here in a vein they burst and hurt. But when done with accurate precision there is no pain, you may sweat a lot the first couple of times, but really no pain. The bugger can remain erect for sometime, so dosage has to be adjusted. One lasted almost 10 hours, wife was worried I was not, gosh it was nice to see my old friend again. Ice packs finally killed it. Notice using spell check, want to get this one right.

So YES there is SEX after Dementia. If you want to take the steps and can remember why you have these needles and stuff in the refrigerator to begin with. Thank god my wife remembers, because I am truly getting more messed up upstairs than you know, it is taking it's toll on me, conversations suck, I loose time, I cannot get out what I want to say without my tongue getting in the way, wife has learned dementiaese, new form of speaking.

Well that is all for now, more the next time whenever that is.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!
Joe

LEGAL CRAP: The views expressed here are the views of the poster. They are not meant in any way fashion or shape to be medical advice or suggestive in anyway as how to improve your sex life, nor do they represent any deceased or living persons (except the poster), and no animals were injured in the writing of this post. Seek medical advice before trying any sexual enhancing means and be sure you are healthy enough for sex. Had to say this or I would get sued and somebody would win possession of my Alzheimer's and FTD, the lucky SOB.

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The las few days have beeen really rotten. I have been confused, frustrated and a pure asshole. I have hurt my wife, not physically. But through being just a complete moron and ass and I cannot explain why.

I need ot openly appologize to her, just doing it directly has not been enough for me, I have to share it with another human being and my God for me to be free from it.

I am afraid this is a sign of things to come, havig real problems with conversations, remembering things, I just zone out and get really confused over stuff.  It is no wonder what I did really got to Lynn, she has so much to put up with me now, not to mention the prior 30+ years. I feel myself slipping more each day, so far I can for the most part notice it, but there are days I have no idea what is what. So I leave you for now, tomorrow if wonder lust here remembers I have some emails to post, that give hope to My World that there will be otherss to watch over us as we wear the current ones out.

God Bless & Keep You & This Country of Ours!!!!
joe

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Hope You Enjoy

First let me apologize for what may apppear on the slideshow, it comes directly from Amazon.com, their book section. You can click on any picture and go there and then if you are an amazon customer you can go shop till your heart is content. One warning once you leave amazon, you get me again.

I have added my favorite song to the site which starts attomatically, if you do not want to list to it, just click the button on the audiopal gagett.  But I do hope you enjoy it as I do.

Thanks for being there for me.

God Bless & Keep You & And This Country of Ours!
joe

PS. Hey you contributors how about it, some words please?

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